"A spirit with the minimum of courage would accept the wealth or the peace of mind if it was necessary to open hand of the intensity of their feelings and appease their talent?"

"-The lovers have to face God, the world, the hell and the worst... Themselves.
- But it's good, isn't it? Being able to face everything, even yourself? Isn't it courage?
-... Yes, it's! "

About friend-lover, fear, trust running through my veins and a bad day.

That’s just me that feel sad about just get one part of a person with two sides? Well, that’s why I recon that’s better a friend-lover than a lover-friend. What I mean is that… “You part time lover and a full time friend.” Cause with friends you made things that you wouldn’t just do with your lover, probable because you would be scary of what he/she would think about it. When I get out with friends, we play, we laugh, we say bull shits, things that they just don’t do with their boyfriends/girlfriends, and why? Or why when are you friend of someone and you start to date this person you just change your way of acting? I don’t know the answer, but I’m sure I’m luck for having my friend-lover. I met you have years and I never stop saying bull shits.*laughs*

But I’m not perfect, far of it. I just get that I’m a really scared person. But something just changed yesterday, in the night. When I was talking to you I didn’t made something that is my habit of doing, I didn’t asked you with how else you were talking to or what were you doing. When I was just going to do it I lost the will. That’s right that I lost my will for almost every thing in that moment, I got surprised with myself. I just saw that it doesn’t matter with how else you were talking to or doing, you still with me ether. That’s what matter. Any way, I fell asleep in the carpet. It wasn’t really comfortable. I woke up with a very bad mood, but something was just different. I felt trust running thought my veins. I’m actually glad for that. I still being a kind of idiot, I know, but less idiot now. I couldn’t tell you this, because of fear. I get scared of you knowing this and just get mad with me. I know that you will actually read this anyway, but let’s continue with the bad day part.

My family suffers with my bad mood. I went out with my bike after fighting with my sister, I didn’t know where I could go, so I ridded on circles. Depressing… I was riding to anywhere when I got a message of you on my cell phone. I got so glad. Tell me, why when are we so glad and call this person that we love we screw everything? That might be karma….! Well, I called you, I just said idiot sentences and probable made you feel bad with my bad and boredom mood. I just felt like: “Why am I so bad in being good?!” The only different is that it wasn’t exactly funny, I was really feeling bad. But it’s comic after all. You know?! Reading what I just wrote, I can just get to one conclusion: I’m completely in love with you. I feel bad, awful, I think you wonderful, I feel miserable with my self… Those are love symptoms aren’t it?*laughs*

I hope when I met you again I can be funnier and my mood has got back to the normal claw one.*sigh* Tomorrow is going to be a kind of hard day. I’m going to the doctor made exams and my Maya classes at night are going to start. I’m afraid, but I’m going there anyway. Something changed, I still feeling strange and my day still dark. But I feel better now. Actually this bad day get funny when wrote.

About friend-lover, fear, trust running through my veins and a bad day.

I'm new here, and I'm happy for can show what I'm doing while I'm learning to do something!

I'm Brazilian, my english is not that good, but I try!

I draw, I write and now I'm also doing digital art! Unless I'm trying to do! Hehe!

I haven't decide what kind of art I wanna do more! I ask my self what I would prefer: Modeling or painting!? That's hard! But I will find an answer!

Thanks!

And Bye!